Ask your children to help you with the chores or to run errands. This will give you all a chance to connect and talk about the important issues, as well as the more fun topics. Try to organise some time together as a family a few times a week – perhaps three meals a week you could sit down to eat as a family. If they feel included in the things you do they are more likely to see the value of including you in the things they do. Talk about yourself – not just about your problems but about your daily life. Children often find it hard to put their feelings into words and just knowing that their parents are listening can be enough. However, an explanation as to why the instructions are important will help your child understand, and therefore cooperate.Ĭommunication is important – during both the good and the tough times. Children may be reluctant to follow instructions if parents command them. But it is important that you try to explain why boundaries are there, rather than issuing orders – for instance, if you pull them away from an open fire explain why. We often use boundaries to protect children from harm or danger. This way is both more positive and more constructive.
While you may be angry, it can help to keep calm and teach your child how he or she could have handled the situation differently, and how he or she can go about it differently next time.
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Rather than thinking of discipline as a punishment, you should use it as a way of teaching your children how to meet their needs without hurting or offending anyone. It’s not selfish to treat yourself once in a while! It doesn't have to be expensive - but putting aside some time to do just what YOU want to do, even if it's only 10 minutes a day - is so important. Admit to yourself that you actually have feelings and needs of your own. If you don’t look after yourself, you can end up feeling miserable and resentful, and you won’t be able to give your children the support they need. Parents often spend all their time looking after everyone else in the family and forget about themselves. Your family will be happier to see more of you, and you'll have a life away from home. Having a balance between work and home – being able to work in a way which fits around family commitments and isn't restricted to the 9 to 5 – boosts self-esteem as you're not always worrying about neglecting your responsibilities in any area, making you feel more in control of your life. It’s not easy balancing your work and home life, but how you manage it can make quite a difference to your relationship with your family.
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